Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Słuchaj kochanie, I've been thinking about that przyjdziesz w upalny, skwarny dzień line - googled meaningfully by you the other day? - and thought that since things didn't work out with the Slaviansky Bazaar maybe if you still deem it appropriate we could go back to plan A and I could come for a few days during an upał that we could spend exchanging smoldering glances at your neighbor's pool and when things get too hot and other than jumping in the water we feel the need to cool off we can go to the mall, pajama shopping or something. So if there might like to be floated new dates, ones when you're around, I'll see if I can swing it. Plus if there's to be a visitation up here - mój drogi - I certainly hope you're on it.

You were in my dreams last night...
You and I are at a large hotel. We’re there for some sort of gathering & celebration, you're there with your family. We arrive at the hall where the party is to take place, a huge insulated bag containing food and plates in tow. A wedding party is leaving as we arrive, we are next on the hotel’s events schedule. It’s a nice hotel, fairly upscale, and because it’s in the heartland it isn’t expensive - $85 a night, and as it is family members are sharing rooms.

I leave the banquet room and go to an adjacent service area to try to get organized, retrieve and wash a few plates. But it’s impossible. To reach the objects I want to get to, I have to precariously make my way over crumbling rubble that falls away off a ledge at my feet, it’s very hard going. I manage to grab a plate and then have to awkwardly maneuver some more to try to wash it. You come to find me and say: leave that, go to your room and I’ll meet you there in fifteen minutes. I’m surprised, and have been so focused on trying to wash the plate that part of me wants to continue, but the look on your face says – no, here is our chance to be together, and I realize that that's true. I have a room to myself, and with the party crowded and in full swing your family won't notice that you're gone for a few minutes.

As desperately as I wished for the dream to continue and to hop straight to the assignation, unfortunately my dream trails off at this point... just some frustrating business - I don't seem to have a room key, am not even sure of my room number, have to ask a waitperson at the banquet how to access my room...

The following morning in my dream (seemingly a continuation of the same dream - I’m at the hotel) I wake up in bed alone. I lie in bed and regard my legs outstretched against the sheets. My legs seem unusually elongated and slender. The narrow bed is set against a corner wall, and straight ahead of me is another room, at the far end of which are windows that are open to a view of another building across the way, which has windows facing mine, at one of which I glimpse an arm – someone is standing at the window, a woman I think. I don’t have the sense that she’s intending to peep into my room, rather that she just happens to be standing there. So I continue to lie in bed, luxuriating and slowly waking.

You come into my room and shut the door behind you. You are unshaven and look tired, a little scruffy, slightly unfamiliar, and in the dim light I have to make sure it's you - I'm delighted and reassured that it is you. You ask me to go get us some coffee. We kiss, at first in affectionate greeting, and then you seize me for an instant and kiss me with passionate intensity. I say – wait – and you release me, and I go into the other room and draw the shades so that we can have complete privacy. I return to the bedroom and ready myself to go for coffee. I’m not sure where to get it, or if it’s free - it would have been free yesterday at the party, but probably isn’t now. As if reading my mind you hand me a five dollar bill, and sit next to me watching as I put on socks and lace my sneakers…

End of dream, not terribly satisfying, but there was the proposal of an assignation, and an intense kiss - plus, quite simply, the palpable presence of you. I wonder if you ever dream about me? If you remember your dreams, that is. I usually don't - haven't in some weeks, in fact - but when I do I try to make a point of setting them down first thing in the morning.

That's it for now, kochanie, wishing you goodnight affectionately, and with dreamed-of intensity when nobody's looking.

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