My dearest, up in the aerie with the last of the lilacs. I went across the road this morning to clip some, fragrant panicles disintegrating, blossoms falling on my hair and all over my black sweater. Nice rain! On my walk later I spied other lilac bushes, blossoms at their feet - the 'peed a puddle' stage? I think of this phrase because the other day someone landed on my blog having googled it.

It's been another gray day, and I've been by myself all day, D with the car on a job a couple of towns north. It's strange not having uttered a word to anyone since early morning (okay, have a good day) except to cats. Did a bit of weeding in the perennial border in the north ell of the house. I love that border, it is both beautiful and manageable. Milled about in the kitchen, ladling chicken stock I'd made the other day into containers for the freezer, unloading the dishwasher and putting together dinner - seasoning a chicken with garlic, herbes de provence, fresh thyme, and lemon; peeling potatoes for mash; chopping butternut squash, carrot, red onion & broccoli and tossing with EVOO on a baking sheet. Went for a vigorous walk, then did a workout while watching Charlie Rose, all about one of the deux sex scandals du jour. I am fascinated, of course, on some level, yet on another (the "gotcha" kneejerk prurience of the media - been there already, a zillion times in history) - yawn. The IMF guy - WTF? He could have had anybody, the "highest class" call girl. The potential Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde aspect though, is disturbing - that perhaps he wasn't "just" a garden variety philanderer, but rather that there was this darker violent side, some compulsion to assault...

And then I think of course, of the other breaking story over the weekend, The Terminator outed to be - no big surprise - human. Here too, there's all sorts of coverup and subterfuge. And I don't know many facts, not at all. But it reminds me of the HBO series Big Love. There was just an awful lot of Arnold to go around, and go around it did, and the domestic servant lived in the household for another ten years. Now that's a little weird. Oh, whatever.

So A.S. had a double life too, but I don't know, yeah he's very powerful and all that - he was secretive, until it was convenient for him not to be so secretive anymore - and so he told Maria -

I don't know, it doesn't seem so evil to me that he had an affair and progeny as a result - so much as calculating, that he - Arnold & Maria both - enjoyed a high-flying political career that could only have been possible by keeping the whole thing quiet. And now - now it seems that neither one of them really needs the marriage anymore, so A told, and M split, fled to Oprah's warm embrace as I've read.

Sorry - yes, I'm cynical. Because clearly, rules or no rules, Catholics with great power & monetary fortune & connections can live however they wish. I suppose that's what disturbs me about the Arnold/Maria thing - the timing, the calculatedness of it. It's a bit passionless, not Big Love at all. More like the contract or compact between them dissolved.

I don't even want to go the whole, oh the hypocrisy route, but ---

well, apples & oranges, but I do support the right for same-sex adults to marry - including all the baggage that comes along with it - all the jumbled, complex, contradictory reasons that heterosexual couples marry

My dearest Branwell (when you land on my site via that image - that is, I imagine it's you - well, I wonder) I suppose there are fine distinctions to be made. Darling, I must go now, it seems that the computer or server are acting up again, plus must go attend to dinner.  Placing my hands in yours, darling, remembering with the greatest pleasure the vision of your smiling face (you at one end of the dining table, listening), loving you very much.

XOXO

P.S. Just now as I launch this post, a woman sings --- there's more true lovers than one - yes, I do agree with that -