Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Hello darling. After five here. It's been a beautiful day, the heat and humidity broke, cracked open like an egg overnight, giving forth a crystalline, sunny, dry day while I wasn't looking.

I check the weather near where you are every day - sounds there like March here. And still no sign of night. Not even "civil" twilight. I love those precise distinctions... civil, then nautical, then astronomical twilight. Yes - those are the gradations, indeed - so beautiful to distinguish among them. (I'm relatively new to the concept - thus my excitement.) Now if we could only get civil authorities at the conservation area to be sensitive to the gradations as well. They have set the automatic gate to lock at 7 every night, which I'm sure effectively chases people out a good 10-15 minutes sooner. More to the point, ordinary citizens, especially those coming home from work, are arbitrarily denied the pleasure of witnessing the summer sun set behind the beautiful mountains. Sunset tonight? Let's see... 8:35 p.m. Civil twilight? 9:10 p.m., astronomical at 10:48. It's a computerized gate for pete's sake - I presume a staffer or volunteer could reset it without much trouble. People leave hopeful notes about that in the signin register (I did too, a while back) but so far (as far as I know, unless the situation's changed just in the last few days) the Powers that Be at the conservation area seem to have ignored them. Honestly - I'm not quick to pull out Marxist interpretations - but truly, that is really cluelessly elitist to me for them not to be sensitive to the desire of people in a public (or semi-public) park to see a sunset for goodness sake.

In all innocence to see a sunset. Or - in all innocence - to make out. How grateful were you and I once upon a time for being left blessedly alone to our amorous devices well after astronomical twilight at the arboretum? God it was cold in that car in winter. Sure wish you'd bought that heavyduty sleeping bag of a bolshevist winter coat many months sooner than you did.

(Belle, don't even go there - you'll depress yourself. Of course you had occasion to use it, in just that way.)

I'm going to the city for a few days. I thought I might leave tomorrow, but am inclined to postpone it a few days (doable). Thought about contacting a couple of old girlfriends to have lunch (such as K.) but am not in the mood. I can't tell them about my mad writing project. Can of worms. Plus nobody but nobody but you could possibly understand. I don't wish to explain myself, and if I even tried to I don't care to endure the inevitable visible facial flipswitch of disapproval. Nor do I wish to see either of them and not feel able to reveal that part of myself. That's a strain too. So - I will be in solitary in Brooklyn, too. It's all right. The change of scenery will still do me good. I was a little worried about internet access, especially over a long holiday weekend when libraries are closed. I emailed my friends this morning to see if I can use their computer (I never touch it, their Mac) and they got right back to me - of course, we'll leave you instructions on how to access the internet, plus here's how you do it - and then the husband sends me an email hours later saying, now why did my wife say that I'd leave you instructions on accessing the internet and then tell you exactly how to access the internet? And he reiterated the instructions & the invitation to - go ahead - click on Firefox, or Safari... They are so sweet. So, anyway, that's a source of anxiety out of the way, darling - the thought of not being able to communicate with you while I'm in the big bad city of 7 or 8 million (well, maybe 2-3 million on a holiday weekend, the seesaw end of the Hamptons sinking temporarily into the sea) - it was unbearable to think about it, and now I don't have to.

Wait - the people on your sea - they didn't simply migrate to a more fashionable watering hole did they? Have you considered that?

Darling, very many hugs & kisses. Thinking of you always, at all stages of Twilight, and I don't mean youthful vampire movies. XOXOXO

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