Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Which was just plain convenient, of course, so I could take my time running various errands, take breaks in between. I had a one-day-only 40% off coupon for the stripmall department store, and found a gorgeous blouse there that must have just arrived, I'm sure it wasn't there last week. A second blouse to go with my basic black skirt. I am so happy with this blouse! It's very pretty, and formfitting, and flattering, and I feel very very attractive in it. I think you would enjoy taking it off me.
After I bought the blouse I drove across vast parking lot acreage to the supermarket, where clearly it was my morning to be there - I scored a bouquet of two-dozen roses for $2.50. I have roses all over the house now, for a song.
Anyway all great fun, and relaxing, and then I had a bit of a siesta, which was fun, and fell asleep for a few minutes too, the combination of which ("snap") was revivifying.
It's awfully sticky right now, darling, must be in the upper eighties at least, and the highest humidity you can get without rain actually falling. The weather's supposed to break overnight, with storms I guess - it's supposed to be in the low 70s tomorrow, so perhaps I'll do a tiny bit of gardening (stoking myself to do so), plant seedling zinnias and cosmos I started from seed.
Not sure what dinner is - the form in which it will be cooked, that is. Before he left for work this morning D said he wouldn't mind grilling tonight. So I bought a whole chicken at the market, and I've peeled a few carrots, and washed and pierced a few russets, and put broccoli in a pot to steam. So either he'll grill these ingredients (save the broccoli) or I'll be roasting them.
Darling, oh darling. I think about you so much. You know I never mentioned when I went to T'town and stayed the night the following morning we all went to church, me included, but then they stayed on longer for whatever reason and I returned to the house, and I looked - quite on purpose, with purpose - through a few photo albums on their bookshelves, looking for images of you. And I did find one, not one of you by yourself, but with your family, in the Jersey kitchen, and you were just beaming, looking absolutely delighted, everyone (your wife, daughters circling you) laughing, as if at a good hearty joke, or it was just a really good time. I loved that image of you though, grinning so very broadly. I think the photo's from a few years ago, but not many years ago. Anyway - that's my sneaky little confession. I replaced the albums carefully as I could on the shelf, just as I had found them.
And beyond that, I have a collection of other images of you, or of you and me together (since I was there to perceive you) in my mind, that I go through, one image at a time, again and again. And they're not just visual. Today, for example, I thought about how I put my arms around you that day that I'd arrived, when I realized it was you, and the sensation of holding you for as long as I dared, a split second longer, and then reaching up to kiss your cheek, before letting you go, and you just standing there -
My love, wherever you are
sigh - big hug - kiss
imagining the sensation
- of your beautiful lips